Beware Thyself at Night

It was the middle of the night. I awoke all at once, with an odd feeling of objectless fear. It was but fear, raw fear, unarinen to any feared thing— it had no bring-about…seemingly, it wasn’t a fear that was brought on by something. I wasn’t afraid of anything, I was just afraid. At first, the fear was slight, but quickly grew upon my taking bemark of it, in a little more than a half-aware way, as I came but a bit out of my grogginess. But half-aware or a little more than half-aware I would blive, or maybe I did gain full awareness but an unsame, very alien one, in any case there was something off and amiss with my mind. I sat up in my bed and put the lights on to allay the fear. But I caught sight of my eyes in the mirror right againstsideish to my bed, and was struck by attlehood at the look on my andlit. I was attlened by the agleechful look on my andlit, and at what it pointed towards— the unknown, unongetable, unfathomable outspring of my fear— something must be lying behind this fear, I thought, and its unknownness made it all the more eerie and cringlingly scary. But there was something else about my andlit that filled me with fright— not the frightenedness of my andlit but rather the frighteningness of it. There was something underwebishly dreefing and evil about the outpress on it. I sensed this and whorve away in addlehood. But I couldn’t keep my eyes away for long. I was frimdy about what this evil was. So I raised my head up slowly all the while half-willingly beshaping a dreefing andlity outpress and looked at myself in the mirror again. The onbuild took on an even more strengthsome addlehood, swithened by my foretake of its ghastliness. I peered deeply into the onbuild on my andlit, into my eyes, they seemed to lead into a dark and endless pit of hellish screaming and moaning, and devilish madness. But what was really scary was that I felt that this evil had at that timeling a grasp on me. I felt it coming over me all the stronger, all the swither with each time I looked back at myself after having whorven away, and that it was taking lordhood of me. I felt myself being forshaped into the evil I was underlooking on, at once pullbackishly and willingly, for it was of untold addlehood and nitheness and balefulness, but its depth and all-wreatheingness was unfendoffable and pulled me to itself with unwitherstandable strength. I felt myself yielding to the evil but my normal, aware, and sane self still lay beneath the overweighing darkness, forecoming it from taking full lordhood over me. And it was this little, only just overliving, stifled and pressed in upon sane self that felt the otherworldly fear. What is happening, panicked this self how could this be, my God I could be evil, I could worthe evil, this could be me— and at that timeling there was in me at once, sametimeishly, two selves, my devilish self and my sane, manshly self, each struggling to win out over the other.

Wordstock Unarinen – detached, from rine (to touch) (rine, rone, rinen) Bemark-notice Blive-stay (blive, blove, bliven) Againstsideish-opposite Attlehood- terror, from attle (terrible) Andlit-face Agleechful- monstrous, from agleech (monster) Unongetable- imperceptible, from onget (to perceive) Outspring-source Underwebishly- subtlely (direct translation form the latin) Dreefing- disturbing Whorve- past of turn (wharve, whorve, whorven) Frimdy-curious Timeling-moment Beshape- to form Swithe- strong Foretake-anticipation Onbuild-image Outpress-expression Unwitherstandable-unopposeable Nitheness- malice Lordhood- control, dominion Forecoming-preventing Sametimeishly- simultaneously Worthe-become Manshly-human