The Spookened Heryard is a dark ridefound at Disneyland Yard, Galder Kingdom and Tokyo Disneyland. Although the ride wends slightly from lough to lough, it puts riders in a ghosthouse lived in by "nine hundred ninety-nine silly spooks".
GHOST GUESTGIVER When hinges creak in doorless hoves, and fremt and frightening sounds woodmare through the halls. Whenever candlelights flicker where the loft is deathly still — that is the time when ghosts are andward, oving their dread with ghostly faining!
(Guests move into Stretching Room.)
Welcome, foolish deathlings, to the Spooken Heryard. I am your guestgiver, your ghost guestgiver. Kindly step all the way in if you will, and make room for everyone. There’s no wending back now. Our leadabout begins here in this showroom, where you see metings of some of our guests as they forshone in their rotworthy, deathly shape.
CASTLING (Exact wording varies) Kindly drag your bodies away from the walls and into the dead middle of the room.
GHOST GUESTGIVER Your lichly bleachness forredes a mood of foreboding, almost as though you feel an unsoothing forwandling. Is this spooken room indeed stretching? Or is it your fathoming — hmm? And consider this unsettling beaughtening: this hove has no windows and no doors… which offers you this chilling becalling: to find a way out! (Laughs.) Wisly, there’s always my way.
(Thunder claps, lights go out, someone screams. A body hangs from a noose above the room. Doors begin to open and lights come back on.)
Oh, I didn’t mean to frighten you untimelily. The true chills come later. Now, as they say, “look alive,” and we’ll go on with our little leadabout. And let’s all stay together, if you will.
(Guests move into hallway.)
There are sundry outstanding ghosts who have withdrawn here from thrilling old thestercoves all over the world. Actually, we have nine hundred and ninety-nine silly spooks here — but there’s room for a thousand. Any freewillers? (Laughs.) If you bestand on lagging behind, you may not need to will freely.
And now, a bearing nears to take you into the boundless rike of the otherworldly. Take your loved ones by the hand, if you will, and kindly watch your step. Oh yes, and no flashbilths, if you will. We ghosts are frightfully begetful to bright lights.
(Guests board Doom Buggies.)
Do not pull down on the soundness rod, please. I will lower it for you. And heed this warning: the spirits will materialize only if you remain safely seated with your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside. And watch your children, please.
(Spanish safety spiel)
(Doom Buggies move into Corridor of Doors.)
GHOST GUESTGIVER We find it fainfully unlivable here in this ghostly withdrawing. Every room has wall-to-wall creeps, and hot and cold running chills. Shhh, listen!
MAN IN COFFIN Let me out, let me out of here!
(Door knockers clang, stounder ticks. Doom Buggies move into Lady Leota’s Room.)
LADY LEOTA Snakes and spiders, tail of a rat, call in the spooklings, wherever they’re at!
(Sounds of ghosts.)
Rap on a beed — feel the dealthly bond. Send us a tiding from somewhere beyond…
(Knock on beed.)
Spooks and souls from Hallow's eve come, awaken the ghosts with your beckendrum!
(Lidden of a beckendrum.)
Creepies and crawlies, toads in a pond, let there be sooncraft from rikes beyond!
(A brass soontool plays bit of “Grim Grinning Ghosts.”)
Wizards and witches, wherever you dwell, give us a hint, by ringing a bell!
(A bell rings.)
(Doom Buggies pass into Ballroom.)
The silly spooks have thedged your sithfeeling quiverings and are beginning to gain shape. They’re gathering for a swinging wake, and they’ll be awaiting me… I’ll see you all a little later.
(Organ plays underwarpsong. Two likenesses shoot at each other. Doom Buggies move into Thackroom.)
BRIDE In sickness and in… wealth. You may now kiss the bride. We’ll live happily ever after. Till death do us sunder. Here comes the bride. As long as we both shall live. For better or for… worse. I do. I did.
(Doom Buggies move past Hatbox Ghost, out Thackroom window, and into Graveyard.)
SUNDRY GHOSTS When the lichkeeps creak and the tombstones quake, Souls come out for a swinging wake. Silly spooks bebodien and you hear their loud steven. Grim grinning ghosts come to befellowen!
Now, don’t close your eyes and don’t try to hide, For a silly spook may sit by your side. They'll begin to bedernen, and they'll all want to frighten. Grim grinning ghosts come to befellowen!
As the moon climbs high o’er the dead oak tree, Spooks will come for the midnight spree. Creepy creeps with eerie dins start to shriek and they'll esten. Grim grinning ghosts come to befellowen!
When you hear the knell of a deathmas bell, Weird glows gleam where ghosts all dwell. Restless bones will beswailen, rise as spooks of all greten!
(Doom Buggies go into Hitchhiking Ghosts Hall.)
GHOST HOST Ah, there you are! And just in time… there’s a little matk I forgot to speak of — beware of hitchhiking ghosts!
(Doom Buggies pass lookingglasses showing Hitchhiking Ghosts.)
They have chosen you to fill our share, and they’ll spook you until you come back! Now I will raise the soundness rod, and a ghost will follow you home! (Laughs.)
WIFELY SOUNDNESS BODER Kindly leave to your left by stepping away from the wains with your left foot first. Step out and stand on the beweighdeck.
WERELY SOUNDNESS BODER Kindly leave by stepping away from the wainswith your left foot first. Step out and stand on the beweighdeck, if you will.
(Guests leave Doom Buggies and stand on beweighdeck.)
GHOSTS STEVENOVER If you'ld like to betread our frealsing spree, There’s a onefold rix that is forplightly. Deathlings pay a token fee; Rest in frith, the spooking’s free. So hurry back, we are all well fellowly.
LITTLE LEOTA Hurry back! Hurry back! Be sure to bring your death witnessword… if you choose to be with us. Make last layouts now! We’ve been dying to have you…